Shepherd's Crook
by Kuro Guardian
Summary: Albus has never heard of the Good Shepherd. I'm sure he'd understand the concept even so.


-1_Hair more gold then silver and eyes that worshipped him._

Everything has a start, but he is too old to go back over it all. Instead he'll say it began with her - a pretty little girl with great blue eyes so warm and innocent. That's what he wanted - to be granted innocence through those eyes. Eyes glazed over with fear and pain and want and pleasure. She'd been a warm, wet vise around his cock. And he'd been coming and she'd stop breathing his hands tight around her little neck. But that's fine, it's alright - she's just a muggle child. A useless, worthless muggle whore.

She loved lemon drops and dandelions. He'd given her lemon drops while eating them relentlessly. She found it funny that he tasted just like them. So smooth beneath her dress, he hadn't time to mount her jerking strangely on the blanket. He plays with her hair lazy kisses down her jaw. She's quiet lips moving calmly - the Lord's Prayer. "Have I hurt you?" She lets him kiss her no longer fond of Lemon drops.

Tom had neither innocence nor ignorance. He hated candy, hated anything he could not comprehend. His dorm mate Lonnie however was a perfect cherub, as curvy as a woman and as sensitive as a girl. His eyes practically pulsed with feeling. Pulsed like his blood onto the leave-strewed ground. Red on brown and his eyes like a doe brought down. Lips moving - "leave me, I want -" Face confused and empty, innocence gone.

Slytherin colors around him as he plows Riddle. No padding, no curves, no pretending this is anything but a revenge fucking. Revenge on Tom for not being the guilty party, for being such a stressful brat, for having Javier's love and confidence instead of his anger and hatred… and pity. "Huh…he hated you…uh…but-ah he pitied you more…Yes! You disgusted him old man. Just -ahh!- like… you - disgust me!"

He was more careful later -or rather next time. Severus is shy, but Sirius is eager…and shallow. Testing Sirius warmth is like a nice soak in the bath; utterly without danger. Severus would be a dark, cold depth of wonder. Awful beauty and astonishing mystery. Severus would be the answer he has always sought: innocence coupled with knowledge. However, Severus is a blade he cannot in good conscious yet drive into his heart.

He slowly strokes the boy listening to his whines. Only this once will he take the Slytherin only this once and- he's lost as soon as he enters him. Sirius stands in the door - jealous and betrayed. This is what makes him special - how dare some effeminate boy with bad hair give Albus such pleasure. There is the hurt. He has never gotten from Albus such a look of adoration and desire.

They stand in his office again. Severus bleeding and Sirius gloating. He pardons the Gryffindor knowing the chasm widens between himself and Severus. It's best, he can't help himself, can't stop himself. Thankfully Severus is an excellent enough potion maker that he doesn't quite need to stay in Madame Prompfry's care. Madame Pompfry's oh so insecure care.

"How can I prove my innocence to you?" And it's too late though even then he feels a tugging at his heart. At least this one lives. James dead and Sirius a traitor and Lupin lost. Only Severus late, broken and twisted. "Don't worry I trust you." to which the shiny black eyes reply, "you fucking _liar_". Two days later he's bending the boy over his desk.

Potter could be a clone of his father, but his eyes are like his mother's. They're sharper then Hermione who is polite but distant and Ron's who hides his blade beneath layers of cream and freckles. Ron who wants to be a hero, any sort, even the kind no one can ever know about. "Sir, if you'll let the others alone…then I don't mind." Of course, -"leave me. I want **Arthur**." Ron - Arthur's son.

Harry needs him as he intended, but he's smarter then expected. The way Ron avoids blue eyes and "fatherly" touches don't escape those bright green eyes. There is hatred there and Voldemort's reach can only be blamed for part of it. It doesn't matter. It really doesn't. Harry needs him and he needs his children, his angels.


End file.
